Saturday, August 22, 2009

"We are humans, but we don't wage war as humans do. We use God's mighty weapons, not wordly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments. We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ." Hebrews 10:3-6
When I think of all the arguments/discussions I have gotten into recently, concerning raising our adopted kids for Christ, I can not help but wonder if people have totally skipped over these verses.
I have heard people say that the biblical standards for discipline and training do not work for adopted children. Don't you think that if God meant for a different standard He would have added a little clause somewhere in scripture? He has not. We do not know better than the Lord--nor does anyone who claims to be a specialist.
I can not help but think of Joseph. As a young man he was beaten and left for dead by his own brothers. When finally pulled from the pit of death, he was captured by slave traders. He was beaten, kidnapped, falsely accused, put in prison...but in the end he was able to say, "what was meant for evil God used for good." He never looked back and tried to find healing through his past.
What are we "using" to knock down strognholds or destory proud obstacles that seek to keep our children in bondage. Far be it from me to wage this war by way of human reasoning.
I am armed and totally equiped with,

"the belt of truth, and the body armor of God's righteousness. I have the shoes of the good news. The sheild called faith that stop the fiery arrows of the enemy. My head is covered by the helmet of salvation and at my side is the sword of the Holy Spirit--God's word!" Ephesians 6:13-17


Adeye said...

Absolutely--SAME standards for ALL children, friend.

Sarah Dawn said...

Sorry you're taking some heat, but in the midst of the battle, sometimes we forget who we are really fighting. God has been opening up my spiritual eyes to see the battle in the everyday. Truth sets people free, but sometimes it makes them uncomfortable when their chains of comfort are being ripped away. I don't yet have any adopted children (soon, in God's perfect timing) but I know the Lord will ultimately lead me to disciple them for His glory.

An international missions leader once gave me a nugget of gold wrapped in advice. He told me that God would lead us how to raise our children, on our knees. On the mission field, some discipline, some do not. Other follow programs, homeschool, and some do not. The truth is that when we bring our children before the Lord and honestly ask Him, He will lead us as to what is His best for our kids.

Blessings to you,
Sarah Dawn

Are These Kids All Yours? said...

AMEN to that. The most important thing to remember is that ALL children are God's! That means we do for all the way we do for one. Pray for guidance, be in the scriptures, and discipline in Love.

David and Sarah said...

Dear sweet sister,

I do so admire your tenacity and your obvious love for your children and for the Lord. He is good and He is worthy!!!

I do, however, disagree that all children should be treated/disciplined, etc. in exactly the same way as every other child. Our precious Father does hold everyone to the same standards and does discipline each one of us, but He doesn't do it in the same way for every single person.

Of course, He lavishes love on each one of us, and every child needs that kind of love. But, as far as the specifics of discipline, we need to know the heart of our children and determine what they need in a specific time and place in their lives in order to discipline them effectively and in love.

I am sharing this with you, because I truly desire to bless you and hopefully, help you learn something from our mistakes. We did spank all of our children (including all of the adopted ones), but I believe that there was a time where we shouldn't have spanked two of our children.
One of our children struggles with completely trusting us, and I believe that spanking her increased this level of distrust.

Though we have not always been perfectly kind and patient, we have tried to never spank a child out of anger, but only out of love. Why then, you may ask, should our precious child struggle with issues of trust? Well, because her birth mother (whom she lived with for 5 years) was violent and angry and untrustworthy. Our sweet girl shuts down at the least inkling of conflict. Only now, as we are trying to give her a completely safe environment, is she beginning to let her guard down. If we were to spank her now, she would only shut down again.

Our daughter is almost 12 years old. We adopted her when she was 7. I didn't realize the extent of this issue until very recently. Yes, other adolescents struggle with identity issues, but this goes much deeper.

Your children are young. With young children, it is not always easy to know what is going on in their minds. But, as they grow, there may be issues that come out more strongly. Yes. Some of them may be as a result of sin. And yes, for most children the discipline should be the same. But, please do not make the same mistake that we did. Please know that for some children, at some times, a different route may be needed--just as our loving Father disciplines us differently at times our children also need to be disciplined differently at times.

Thank you for your thoughts and passion for our precious Lord.

In the love of our beautiful Savior,

Tracy said...

Dear friend,
I think you should not be questioning your mothering or your blogging. Obviously, you take everything first to the Lord and your posts encourage and strengthen us other mothers. God chose you to mother those children. Just mother as He leads you, you know them best and the Father knows you and your heart the best. In that, you cannot go wrong. Please do not stop sharing with us as you are an inspiration and a model of the Proverbs woman.